Pastor’s Desk

Then It Came To Me…

“Can We Be Friends? I know this question sounds like an invitation to engage in a special relationship, to share special times, good and bad, to hold out a special hope for one another. While these phrases describe some of the good things about friendship, the initial question is not an invitation to these things. “Can We Be Friends?” For our purpose, this question goes to the foundational matter that should be settled before any invitation is extended. Our theme begs a broader understanding of and commitment to key foundational concepts upon which friendship is built. “Do we have what it takes to be friends? Do we understand the depth and breadth of friendship? Are we walking in sacrificial, unconditional love? Are we stable? Do we guard trusts and keep confidences? Do we speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15)? While these questions are not exhaustive, they do point to matters essential for good, godly friendships. Christians will profit greatly by embracing the larger issue, “Can we be friends?” before making the invitation, “Let’s be friends.” It is lamentable to see the decaying remains of aborted friendships too often marring the landscape of our church and para-church groups. These rotting heaps of fallen friendship reflect what could have been, should have been, used to be, or never should have been. The mounds of decaying friendship flesh become the breeding ground for infections that are carried into new “friendships.” Persons who leave trails of decaying friendships are usually unready for the next friendship. Friendships predicated on the hurts brought from failed friendships most often fail themselves. The quick-fix, fast-paced drive for momentary satisfaction is part of the seducing spirit bringing havoc to so many areas of the body of Christ, including friendship. We must resurrect the drive for enduring, committed, tried-and-true, godly friendship. We must learn and follow the patterns of Jesus the Christ, other scriptural models, and saints around us who evidence a mastery of the Word of God as it relates to “friends” and “friendship.” Let us notice a few scriptural reflections and directives on the matter. Proverbs 16:28b ~ “and a whisperer separateth chief friends.” Proverbs 17:9 ~ “He that covereth (not covers up) a transgression seeketh (secures) love; but he that repeateth a matter separateth very friends.” Proverbs 17:17 ~ “A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” May you and I be challenged to bear fruit worthy of our Lord’s name. May we be led to personalize the theme of this writing and deal with the matter, “Can I Be A Friend?”. Do I have what it takes? Do I possess the skill and will to be a godly friend? If not, what am I going to do about that? “Can We Be Friends?”

Shalom, my Friends, Bishop Kenneth C. Doe

Bethesda Christian Fellowship

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